Isn't maturity supposed to make us smarter?

The scriptures teach that we should be like unto a little child. There is an often quoted phrase, "Out of the mouth of babes." Well, here is one.


Last year, liberal voters in California fought for a change in what was to be accepted as a marriage. The law states that marriage is between a man and a woman. Many voters wanted to change that to allow same-sex relationships to be recognized as legal and binding. This was presented in the form of "Prop 8". The First Presidency admonished all members of the church, one of the very few times I have ever heard the Brethren take a political stand, and fight against this Prop to protect the sanctity of marriage. As you can imagine, this sparked many conversations among the children and especially when there were many liberals, even same-sex couples, at their school. Karsten and I tried to be as open and frank as we could with the kids.

It was amazing to me how the litle ones reacted. Let me clarify.  When I say "little ones" I am referring to the younger ones of the whole clan.  These "little ones" ranged from age 5 to age 10.  They are too young to understand the ramifications of this bill. As far as they are concerned, they see the physical differences between a man and a woman, they have the example of their parents, and what they have been taught. Their understanding of the "facts of life" are very simple and elementary. There must be a man and a woman. No questions asked. Why then do adults, who are supposed to be more mature, have such difficulty with this basic concept? I loved Elder Packer's talk at conference when he gave the example of the child telling the teacher how to tell the sex of the ktiten.  ". .  .  there are those today who not only tolerate but advocate voting to change laws that would legalize immorality, as if a vote would somehow alter the designs of God’s laws and nature. A law against nature would be impossible to enforce. For instance, what good would a vote against the law of gravity do?"

But, I stray from what I originally wanted to write. Logan, my 10 year old, was very confused with the issue. As only he can, he asked, "Mom, if there are two males trying to get married, who decides which one wears the dress?" Very plainly and simply put. As young and naieve as he is, Logan still gets it. Oh that we could all be as little children.

Age, experience, technology, education. All important in their own right. But when it clouds our understanding and makes us question the simple laws of nature, we are the dumb ones. Not the children. They get it!!!

What is a friend?

My favorite, almost, 15 year old and I were talking today about friends and what constitutes a friend.  There are "church" friends, "school" friends, "going-out" friends, "talking on the phone" friends, "see every once in a while" friends, and there are your "confide everything and will always be there no matter what" friends.  I'm sure, by definition, one of these is an acquaintance but does anyone even use that word any more?  Kind of like the word "love".  So over used it has lost its true significance. 

For example, if you take the "facbeook" definition of friend, anyone that you invite to share in your daily ramblings is considered a "friend".  I'm beginning to think that with facebook, texting, etc. the definition of "friend" has evolved into someone we can share whatever we want as long as we are concealed behind technology and emotion is removed from the equation.

My favorite, almost, fifteen year old asked me who my friends are.  A valid question.  She has been noticing a separation between herself and some of her friends.  Different schools and interests are a few of the contributing factors. Part of growing up.  People fade in and out of life.  But who, then, is a true friend?  Are their different levels of friends?

I will admit.  According to many definitions of a friend, I am a terrible friend.  I am not one that will call and chat on the phone.  I don't spend a lot of time on facebook.  I don't text.  I don't call people up and arrange to meet them or spend time together.  I don't send out many e-mails.  I am terrible at sending cards, whether birthday or holday.  I forget everyone' birthdays.  I guess you would say I don't have any friends.

For me, the word "friend" is special.  Let me give you an example of my favorite friends.  These friends are my confidants.  The ones I can share my joys and sorrows and I know the info, if confidential, isn't going any further than their individual brain cells.  On the flip side, they are ones that can share with me and I don't feel like I have to share with them.  I am never judged by what I say or feel.  I am never judged for my mistakes.  The relationship doesn't change because of lack of communication, distance of location, health, or other factors.  These special friends are my family.  My husband, my siblings, my parents.  I love these friends.

What would I then call all those other wonderful people in my life that I talk to and spend occasional shared moments?  That is a good question.  By defnition, they are more than an acquaintance.  I need a new word.

Emotion.  I think that is what keeps me from labeling all as friends.  Maybe that's it.  I have "emotional" friends and "non-emotional" friends.  No, that doesn't sound right.  Yet, it does have a ring of truth to it.  I guess a friend to me is someone who truly knows me and one I have allowed to truly know me.  Hmmm.  That is something to think about.

Well, however we all label all those people that are important to us, here is a big "thank you" to all of you.  Even if I don't talk to you forever or forget birthdays, etc. I'm thankful for all those important people in my life that influence me in some way.

Yesterday's thin is tomorrow's fat

I'm tired of being fat.  "Fat?" you say, "Oh, give me a break.  Fat between your ears."

No, really!!!  I can prove it.

If I look at a doughnut, I gain weight.  If I sniff a brownie, I put on weight.  If I even THINK about a cookie, I gain weight.  Dang it!!!!  There goes 5 pounds.  Let me show you what is the "new" sexy.

 Okay, so in REAL life, I thought this person was pretty slender.  Obviously, not enough.

 Just when you thought lipo was enough.  Now you have to not only shave your legs, exfoliate said legs, buff them, oil them, and then if you even THINK you can put these pants on, guess again.  You need a shoe horn!

Are legs supposed to go into those things?  Oh, I get it.  The shirt covers the upper part of the body that can't fit in those things.  I now understand the "pants down around the lower butt" look.

I personally like the look of that painting years ago of the voluptuous woman looking over her back at the camera.  She has "meat" on her bones, has a few roles, and is still sexy and happy (I'd search for that picture but I'm too scared of what will come up).

How come those of us who have had a real life meaning having had kids, not exercising hours in the gym, no chef, no money to have all body parts altered, etc.  are considered "fat" and not sexy or desirable?

Well, I flip my nose at all of you's. AAAWWWW, who am I kidding.  I fight the bulge, deprive myself of a few calories, hit the gym more than is healthy, pinch my fat, and wish for smaller numbers.  I'm going to dish up another bowl of ice cream.